April 2011: A Retelling of Cinderella

Once upon a time, there was a sixteen-year-old girl named Cinderella. She loved going to church, and obeyed all the commandments. She dressed modestly, obeyed the Word Of Wisdom, had clean language, and prayed every night. She was always kind to everyone. Her favorite books were Twilight and The Book Of Mormon. Despite being a good person, she was in a not-so-good situation. She lived with her wicked stepmother and ugly stepsisters who made her do all the work. Every day it was the same. "Cinderella, clean my room," "Cinderella, mop the floor," "Cinderella, unclog the toilet," "Cinderella, take that dog for a walk and pick up the dog poop." But she never complained. She loved her stepsisters, and prayed for them.



One day, a letter arrived in the mail. It was an invitation to a church dance, and the bishop's son, who was named Caleb, would be there. Because Cinderella's wicked stepsisters thought the bishop's son was "sooooooooo hot," they wanted to come, hoping he would choose one of them.
Cinderella's stepsisters made Cinderella brush their hair and put on their makeup, telling her exactly what to do and freaking out when she did something wrong. They had horrible fashion sense, and they just got uglier than they actually were. But Cinderella never said anything.
On the night of the dance, Cinderella didn't have enough time to get ready. She prayed that she could go to the dance. Suddenly, the June 2001 issue of Teh Chum waved it's magic wand and gave her a beautiful dress, and a nice limo so she could go to the dance. She thanked it, and went to the dance. But it warned her that the spell would only last until midnight.
At the dance, Caleb wasn't pleased. Most of the girls were dressed immodestly, and even the ones that were dressed modestly had tattoos, piercings, or dyed hair. Some of them even just plain looked ugly.
Suddenly, he saw Cinderella. Unlike all the other girls, she was dressed modestly, didn't have piercings or tattoos, and was beautiful. So obviously, he danced with her, and only her. They danced until the clock struck twelve. She got into her car and drove all the way back to her house. The bishop's son went looking for her, but all he could find was the tiny CTR ring that she had on her finger (and it wasn't one of those adjustable ones).
He searched all around the kingdom for Cinderella by going up to random people's houses and getting the girls that just might be Cinderella to try on the CTR ring. But everyone had really fat fingers, so it didn't fit.
Meanwhile, Cinderella's stepsisters were talking about how there was a "beautiful princess" at the ball.
Finally, Caleb got to Cinderella's house. Her stepsisters answered the door. Now they had unbelievably fat fingers, so obviously it didn't fit them.
"Are their any other girls in this house?" he asked.
"No!" said the stepsisters.
Just as he was about to walk out the door, he heard Cinderella's voice. He was sure she was the girl he had met at the dance, but he made her try on the ring to see if it fit, which it did. When Cinderella's stepsisters found out that she was the beautiful princess who had been at the ball, they apologized for treating her like crap. She forgave them.
After dating for a couple years, and after each of them went on their missions, Cinderella and Caleb got married in the temple. And they all lived happily ever after.
TEH END