Also, I didn't type the whole thing 'cause it's too freaking long and most people know what I'm talking about anyway. Hail Satan, I guess. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Once upon a time, there were two sisters named Eliza and Ashlee. And I mean actual sisters, not Sister missionaries or anything like that. They were also really rich and they lived in a castle (they weren't princesses, though; they lived in Alpine, Utah). Anyway, they were very close, and they liked to build snowmen. There was a twist, though: Eliza had magical powers that allowed her to control ice and snow. But then something happened. Eliza and Ashlee were at church in the middle of the night because their parents were doing important things there. They got bored, so Eliza used her magic to make it snow inside the Primary room. They had a lot of fun playing in the snow and building snowmen until Eliza accidentally froze Ashlee's brain.
"Mommy, Daddy!" cried Eliza.
"Eliza, what did you just do?" yelled her father, the king.
"It was an accident," said Eliza.
They went to their home teachers (who were also trolls), who erased Ashlee's memories of magic. The trolls showed Eliza a vision of her being killed by an angry mob, saying "fear will be your enemy."
Eliza and Ashlee's parents then had the most amazing idea (that was sarcastic): they would close the castle gates and lock Eliza in a room until she could control her magic. They isolated her from everyone, including Ashlee, and discouraged Eliza going to church.
Every Sunday, Ashlee would knock on Eliza's door and invite her to Primary.
Do you wanna go to Primary?
Come on let's go and pray
I never see you anymore
Come out the door
It's like you've gone away.
We used to be best buddies
And now we're not
I wish you would tell me why!
Do you wanna go to Primary?
You don't have to be in the program...
"Go away, Ashlee," Eliza always said sadly.
Okay, bye.
This went on for many years. Ashlee got bored, but she continued to remain optimistic.
Do you wanna go to church now?
Or Mutual on Wednesday night?
I think some company is overdue
I've started talking to
Those pictures of the Nephites!
(Hang in there, Captain Moroni!)
It gets a little lonely
All these empty rooms,
Just watching the hours tick by.
Then a terrible thing happened. When Ashlee was a Mia Maid and when Eliza would've just graduated from Young Women's, their parents died in a plane crash.
After going to her parents' funeral, Ashlee knocked on Eliza's door.
Eliza?
Please, I know you're in there,
People are asking where you've been
They say "be loving," and I'm trying to
I'm right out here for you, just let me in
I'm going to get the missionaries.
I promise they're nice.
Maybe they can help you.
Do you wanna go to church now?
As Ashlee said those words, Eliza was mourning the death of her parents.
Eliza knew her parents would want her to stay in her room where she
couldn't hurt anyone rather than attend their funeral and possibly hurt
someone.
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